


DON'T WAKE THE BEAR

by rubyelf



Category: Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: Hobbit Smut, M/M, silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-16
Updated: 2012-03-16
Packaged: 2017-11-02 01:50:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/363688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rubyelf/pseuds/rubyelf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pippin finds that certain childhood games have developed some rather different rules... and that he no longer always wins them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	DON'T WAKE THE BEAR

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of Rubyelf's Ruby-Verse AU.

TITLE: DON'T WAKE THE BEAR

AUTHOR: [](http://rubyelf.livejournal.com/profile)[ **rubyelf**](http://rubyelf.livejournal.com/)  


CHARACTERS: Merry/Pippin, Boromir

RATING: NC-17

WARNINGS: ruby-verse, hobbit smut, tickling

SUMMARY: Pippin finds that certain childhood games have developed some rather different rules... and that he no longer always wins them.

DISCLAIMER: Characters do not belong to me. They are just here to play

Short and silly hobbit smut. Attempts to engage Boromir in said smut are not successful. This is unlikely to deter them, but for the moment his virtue appears safe... whatever virtue he's got anyway, since the hobbits clearly have none whatsoever. 

[](http://moth2fic.livejournal.com/profile)[**moth2fic**](http://moth2fic.livejournal.com/) wanted some hobbit smut to assist in recovery. I've got about four fics (hobbit and otherwise) on the desktop at the moment, but this was the shortest, so it got finished first. Hope it makes you feel better!

  


  


**DON'T WAKE THE BEAR**

 

“You used to like that game,” Pippin said.

Merry yawned and looked up from where he was laying near the foot of Boromir’s bed with his head pillowed on Boromir’s thigh. “What game?”

Pippin, who had been nestled against Boromir’s hip and dozing a few minutes ago, was now sitting up and smirking at Merry in a way that made Merry wish very much his cousin would go back to sleep. Finn, draped across the sleeping man’s feet, looked up, realized that the two noisy creatures in her master’s bed had awakened, and flopped to the floor and meandered off to her rug by the fire.

“What game did you mean, Pip?”

Pippin grinned. “Don’t Wake the Bear.”

Merry rolled his eyes. “We haven’t played that since we were children, Peregrin.”

“It was a good game,” Pippin said.

“You only think that because you made up the rules,” Merry said.

“The rules were very simple,” Pippin argued.

The rules had, indeed, been simple in theory, if a bit complicated in practice. Little Pippin’s game of “Don’t Wake the Bear” involved Pippin finding a sleeping relative and designating some item on the relative’s person that had to be retrieved, or something to be done to the unfortunate relative, without disturbing the chosen “bear”. Scores were kept for weeks on end, with points tallied for completing the task without the “bear” being woken, for coming up with a particularly fiendish challenge, and also for, if the sleeping bruin was disturbed, making an escape from the room before one could be blamed for the activity. Pippin had generally scored himself extra points if he could make sure someone _else_ got blamed for the trouble, which Merry didn’t think was very sporting, especially since he was usually the one taking the blame when his more agile cousin escaped.

“If you’re thinking of playing ‘Don’t Wake the Bear’ with Boromir, I’m leaving,” Merry said.

“You haven’t even heard the challenge yet!”

“Yes, but we’re currently in bed from a man that’s one step away from actually being a bear, and I don’t care to test him.”

“We’re not going to do anything to him,” Pippin said. “We’re just going to do something _near_ him. Without waking him.”

He slid across the bed toward Merry. Merry tried to squirm away, but suddenly he found Pippin’s arms around him, Pippin’s cock pressing against his buttocks, Pippin’s clever little hand sliding around to rest on the hardening length that Merry’s light undershorts did nothing to hide.

“Stop that,” he hissed.

“Don’t wake the bear,” Pippin giggled.

Merry’s head was still resting on Boromir’s leg, and he glanced up, but the man was snoring softly and appeared to have taken no notice of what Pippin was up to.

“I don’t like this game.”

“Part of you likes this game,” Pippin murmured, stroking through the thin fabric until Merry had to bite his lip to keep from moaning. Pippin knew him too well; even through the cloth his fingers knew exactly how to trace lightly over the smooth head, squeezing as his hand slid down, then tightening again as it stroked back up. He closed his eyes, tried not to buck against Pippin’s hardness pressing against him from behind.

“Now, wait a moment,” Merry said, forcing himself to pull away. “Is this a game where if I come first, I lose?”

“No. It’s a game where whichever one of us can make the other come without waking the bear wins,” Pippin said.

“Hmm,” Merry murmured, carefully rolling them both over Boromir’s outstretched leg until Pippin was on his back between the man’s legs. “What happens if the bear wakes up?”

“Whoever made the noise that woke the bear is the loser.”

“Ah, but Pip… don’t you know I know how to make you make all sorts of noises?”

Pippin squirmed, trying to get into a better position, but Merry’s fingers were twisting his nipples hard, until he bucked and squeaked and conceded. Satisfied with this momentary victory, Merry slid downward until he was between Boromir’s feet, glancing at them to make sure they weren’t moving before he reached for Pippin’s breeches and pulled the laces loose. Pippin glared at him.

“That’s cheating.”

“Is not.”

“Is… oh, lord, Merry!”

Merry could not respond, since his mouth had just closed around the head of Pippin’s cock, but no response seemed to be needed, and he got to work, his hand wrapping around the base and stroking in rhythm with his mouth, no subtlety or teasing intended at the moment; lovely as it was to torment Pippin until he whined and pleaded and thrust into Merry’s mouth, too much teasing might give Pippin the chance to take back over.

“Merry… please…”

“Mmm-hmmm…”

With a low, frustrated moan, Pippin put his hands on Merry’s forehead and pushed it away. Merry released his cock with a long, wet lick.

“Not letting you win that easily,” Pippin hissed, and before Merry knew it, Pippin had flipped them both, with their heads now on one of Boromir’s legs and their intertwined thighs draped over the other. Both glanced up nervously, but the man continued to snore contentedly.

“What do you think you’re going to do to me?” Merry whispered.

“The same thing you were doing, only better.”

He slid down and tugged at the waist of Merry’s undershorts, immediately grasping the now-freed length in one hand, stroking with long, slender fingers, licking at the head with broad, wet, enthusiastic swipes of his tongue. Merry gritted his teeth.

“Try your best, then.”

Pippin grinned and that soft, hot mouth with its twining tongue slid over Merry’s cock. He could not keep his hips from bucking, but managed to silence a moan.

“I always win this game,” Pippin whispered.

His mouth was gone, leaving Merry shivering, but when he looked down he realized he was in a lot of trouble; Pippin’s green eyes were darkened and wild under his curls, and he had thrust three long fingers into his own mouth, making a show of sucking and licking at them.

“Pip…”

Pippin chuckled and withdrew his fingers, lowering his mouth to its task again. Merry tried to squirm away, but suddenly there were wet fingers slipping between his legs, spreading and stroking at him. Merry could not stifle the soft cry that escaped him when Pippin abruptly pressed two fingers into him, making him buck helplessly into Pippin’s mouth, only to slump back down and drive those slender fingers deeper into him. Pippin hummed his satisfaction and Merry moaned again, writhing, caught between Pippin’s sinfully talented mouth and the fingers inside him driving him rapidly toward completion.

“Pip… stop… you’ve got to stop… please…” he whispered frantically.

A moment later he lost the ability to form words as Pippin twisted his fingers and drove them in deeper, and Merry jerked and fought back a cry as he surrendered.

Pippin sucked hard until Merry was slumped and boneless, all resistance gone, sprawled against Boromir’s legs.

“Told you so,” Pippin said proudly. “I always win this… oh!”

His boast turned into a squeal of alarm when a large hand landed on the back of his neck and lifted him to his feet.

“Do you, now,” Boromir said, smirking at the younger hobbit.

“Oh,” Pippin managed.

“Who wins if the bear wakes up and catches both of you?”

Pippin glanced at Merry, wide-eyed. “Well, that’s never actually happened before.”

“I think it means the bear wins and gets to toss a certain arrogant Took into the bedpan headfirst,” Merry suggested.

Pippin grinned slyly. “If the bear wins, that means that both losers should be forced to provide the bear with whatever sort of attention might be necessary to placate him.”

Boromir rolled his eyes. “As if waking up with you two squirming and moaning in my lap wasn’t bad enough… the bear doesn’t want any of that sort of thing, little Pippin.”

“What does the bear want?” Pippin asked, eyeing him warily.

“I think,” Boromir said, “that the rudely awakened bear should have the right to ruthlessly tickle the losers until they cry and beg him to stop. And then the losers should have to go and fetch the bear a large breakfast. And after that, the bear will have a chat with them about exactly what the future consequences of waking this particular bear might be.”

“Don’t say that,” Merry warned. “Pip will think it’s a challenge.”

“Pippin thinks everything’s a challenge,” Boromir said.

Pippin grinned at him cheekily. “You’re the biggest one. And the handsomest.”

“And the one you’re never going to win, little one. Now, where shall I start tickling first?”

 

 

  
[](http://pics.livejournal.com/rubyelf/pic/001a355x/)

 


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